The Girl Named After a Song
by KawaiiVictory
Summary: [SASODEI] The story take place in an alternative universe where, instead of losing his fight against Chiyo & Sakura, Sasori escapes and joins up with Deidara again so both can travel back safely to the base. Shortly after, these two lovers decide they want to start a family but they still work full time and have to somehow balance their life between work and raising their daughter.
1. Prologue

Hello! Here just some quick info for all you who don't follow me on tumblr or DeviantArt!

Iris is my Sasodei child oc that I've been working on for quite some time and this story is basically a way for me to explain how she acts, how her personality had formed and how her childhood was. Even though she's pretty old in this story I'll write some parts as flashback to tell about important milestones in her life where she was younger.

Iris is named after the song Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls because that is the song I refer to as "Sasori and Deidaras' song". Like every couple have their couple song. Her mother's name is Seo because I'm uncreative and it was pretty. I thought that the closest Sasori and Deidara could have to have their own child would be if they got themselves an egg downer and a surrogate mother. So Iris is actually not Sasoris' biological daughter but Seos' and Deidaras'. Deidara provided the sperm and they bought the egg from Seo who also carried Iris. She lives at her mother's place when her dads' are out on missions and her mother has an orphanage so she is surrounded by kids all the time. Iris exist in an alternative time line where Sasori survives his battle with Chiyo and Sakura and once the artist join up again they decide that (since both almost died) they want to have a child together. One year later Iris is born.

* * *

 **Prologue**

"There we go! This should hold until we get back to the hideout." Sasori sighed while gently brushing his hand against the newly bandaged stump that was the remains of Deidaras left arm. The blond gave the, no longer hurting, arm a lift and examined it. After having it sloppy bandaged up for four days with no changes it had started to look pretty bad and infected, but nothing that Sasori couldn't handle. Being teammates with a medical trained shinobi sure had its benefits.

Deidara gave his partner a short 'thank you' as he carefully felt the stump with his still intact arm. With a huff and a pet on the blonds' head Sasori stood up and walked back to Hiruko to put his tools away. "What would I do without you Danna, hm..?" The blond chuckled. The nice feeling in his arm made him grin so stupidly.

"You would be dead." Sasori chuckled back with one foot inside Hiruko as he was getting back inside to be ready for when their enemy attacked.

The blond yelped to stop Sasori in his tracks and waved to get his attention. "You could at least help me get my cloak back on, hm." He sighed defeated, motioning to the open cloak he was sitting on, shielding him from the cold cave ground.

Sasori apologized with another chuckle and returned to once again crouch at his partner, this time helping him slide his arms back into the cloaks sleeves. Both their breath feel in sync as the puppet slowly buttoned up the cloth; intentionally he moved closer to hang over his younger partner.

"You're always so cocky... And so sure of yourself, I can live on my own yanno, hm." Deidara smiled as they were inches from each other's faces. The caramel eyes looked up into the sapphire ones, the older man took a second to just stare. Not to think, his answer was clear as water but the beautiful man he loved so dearly always distracted him. He responded to the young man's smile with one of his own.

"Yeah... But I don't think I could ever live alone again."

The lumpy puppet gave the blond a last annoyed glance before he soared out the cave on his bird, disobeying him once again. How could he even be in love with that brat? It was an interesting question. One he couldn't think of now seeing he would have to battle his grandmother first.

Sasoris glare was sharp as knife in his neck as he flew out, the jinchuuriki chased him all according to his plan. Or Sasori wouldn't call it a plan, he was improvising. But improvising was a plan in its self. And he still had the confident from taking down the last jinchuuriki, this would be no problem. Sasori was just grumpy.

So she used the antidote to save the girl. Smart move since she had a stronger chance of finishing him, Sasori thought. But what was the point of winning this fight anymore? Big parts of his collection were destroyed. Months and months of work gone in a flash, shattered across the cave. Sasori watched the two women from a far, deciding his next move. He didn't have many seconds to think. He had to make a choice. Risk it or go home safe. But what was his home without his puppets? He'd never had a home, never had a family. But he did have something worth more than this victory. In a flash he escaped running off into the woods on wooden legs and only one arm holding the robe up so he wouldn't trip. He was already weak like this so he needed to put as much space behind him as fast as possible so he could met up with backup.

Sakuras' body twitched as the puppeteer jumped off but Chiyos' pained wail seconds after pulled her attention back. Chiyos' last moments were more important than that coward.

Deidara escaped as a clone took over his place in the fight. If he only had his left arm, then he could hold the right cloak arm shut and not leave a trail of blood after himself. Hopefully they were all to "caught up" in his explosion to notice. After losing his second arm he didn't have much choice. He could take them all down with him or escape. He had chosen the second for one simple reason. He had made a promise. He wasn't far away from the meeting spot. Sasori would scroll him so for being reckless. He could hardly wait!

Deidara arrived at the meeting point first, hiding against a tree he jumped up and down restlessly, fearing that if he stopped he would pass out. "Common, where are you?" He muttered while looking around impatiently. He would come! He was coming! He couldn't be hurt... right?

"Oh thank heavens you're alright!" Deidara heard from behind and he barely had time to turn around before Sasori was around his neck with his single arm, kissing him all over. The younger member laughed low trying not to cause a scene and stopped Sasori, showing him the new wound. As happy and relieved as he was he couldn't ignore the fact that he was bleeding to death slowly.

"What happened to you? You look terrible, hm!" Deidara teased as the puppet started healing his wound shut for now. He needed to stop the bleeding first, reattaching arms would come later.

"I could say the same of you." Sasori snorted and placed one more kiss on Deidaras cheek.

Deidara was his home now.

Sasori and he had made a pact.

He wanted to be with the blond forever.

Never would they abandon each other. Not even death could part them, because they had made a promise to never die on a mission.


	2. Chapter 1

**16 years later**

It was a rather sunny afternoon, early summer, yet there was one girl who decided to spend her day inside with a book by the window.

Up on the second floor in her and her sisters' bedroom she had a nice view over the road out of town. The long road that they always took when they came to pick her up.

Iris sighed again as she looked up from her book and the road was still dead. Sure they hadn't said a time they would show up but they usually came so much earlier than this. Had they forgotten..? No, no she was sure they knew, she had talked to Deidara not many days ago, they wouldn't forget about her.

Ten more minutes passed and she kept reading to keep herself occupied. When her chapter ended she looked up again. And there in the distance where two silhouette walking with quick steps towards the orphanage, one short and broad figure and one tall, both dressed in black cloaks.

Iris lit up and shoved her book down her already packed backpack and ran down the stairs to find her mother.

"Oh, are they here now?" Seo chuckled entertained as the girl stumbled into the kitchen to hug her goodbye. Iris nodded rapidly and gave her mother a quick hug before she turned out again.

"Hey! Is that all I get? You'll be gone all summer!" Seo whined with a smirk as she pulled back the blond girl by the arm and forced her to stay longer.

"Right, sorry mom." Iris replied with attitude but with a grin she let the woman hug her a bit longer. Seo fluffed her blond hair and gave her forehead a kiss before she could let her go.

"You be nice to them now. And take care of yourself too, but you can always come back here if they're too much, thought." Seo said motherly as they parted ways.

Iris didn't even bother to run back into the yard to say goodbye to her half siblings and the orphans. They knew she was leaving today so most had wished her goodbye at the breakfast table since they all wanted to run out and play. She was among the older kids so she preferred a nice day inside with her books instead of out in the sun. And she especially didn't want to start any games today since she knew she could be picked up at any moment.

"Dad! Papa!" The young girl cried happily as she ran outside. Her dad's stopped in their tracks and waited for her come to them.

Smiling she hugged the taller man who lifted her up laughing. "Woow, shouldn't we say hello to you mother too, honey? Hm." He asked as he let her sit on his hip like a little kid.

The other, shorter man instantly tensed up and somehow managed to look even grumpier then before but Iris shook her head which calmed him down.

Deidara glared at Hiruko since he knew Sasori was hurried for all the wrong reasons but he didn't argue. Iris was excited to be with them so she probably wanted to get going as fast as possible too.

"Alright, then let's go." Deidara huffed and put down his daughter. After stretching his back out moaning he turned around and the three of them started walking back up the road. "Maaan, you're not so young anymore, Iris. I can't be lifting you, hm." Deidara joked and puffed her side.

Iris giggled at her stupid dad and quickly turned to give her other father a hello but she stopped herself seeing how his eyes were locked with the road. His chakra was so dark today, maybe it was best not to speak with him.

Iris said hello quickly and after Sasori grunted a hello back she nodded and turned to keep a conversation with Deidara.

They walked on as the two blonds kept up a heated conversation about everything possible. Sasori walked in silence beside them, not showing any signs of listening or caring. Or so it seemed as Iris glanced at him every now and then.

Sasori seemed so worried and tense but Deidara seemed so joyful. Was he only trying to keep the mood up to hide something bad or was Sasori really just in a bad state? That was just as possible but she couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong.

"I'm not gonna lie, we're not doing so well right now…" Deidara sighed as he saw his girl look at his partner a little longer than the other times. 'I knew it!' Iris thought as she looked back up on her younger father. There was something bad going on that they didn't want to talk about but apparently they had too.

Deidara gave his daughter a reassuring smile to ease her a little before continuing. She noticed how he didn't even turn to Sasori for support like he normally would do. It was kind of scary to see them so distant to each other.

"We're not heading to Amegakure this time... Our headquarter is… Actually all of Ame is in the possession of the five great nations, hm." Deidara said while his gaze did the same as Sasoris and focused on the road ahead. "They've always been planning to take us out since we're all wanted criminal in our respective countries but we never thought they would actually attack since that technically would mean they declared war on us. And they won that war just because we- …"

Deidara took a moment to think before he changed tracks on his tale. "We all made it out in one piece but Pein lost the county. He's furious and everyone else is completely taken off guard. It's been a tense few weeks since we've been on the run but we're finally starting to settle back in, hm."

Deidara slowed down and stretched out his hand for the shaken girl who had started to walk slightly slower as his explanation went on. Sasori was the first to come to a full stop but Iris was a close second and as she grabbed Deidaras' hand he stopped too.

"And you still want me to stay with you this summer?" Was the first thing she asked. "I mean, that's quite the big deal! You don't- you don't have any safe land, I'll be in danger-"

Deidara huffed and smiled as he fully embraced her. "True, but you've always been in danger when being with us, you know that honey. The only difference now is that we're staying in a different location. And you're trained for this, you know what to do if things go bad, hm."

Iris stared at Deidara with cringed eyebrows for awhile before looking down on Sasori trying to get his word on this. He simply kept refusing to be part of the conversation and Deidara quickly made sure she focused back on him.

"If you want to go back we won't stop you, but we both really miss you and we want to hang out with you." He said. "I think we all need a little sunshine in our lives right now, hm."

Iris slowly nodded and let herself give out a weak smile. Her smile did grown though as they started walking again.

"Could we go fishing then?" She asked as she tried to plan whatever activities they could do as a family. Deidara lit up and squeezed her hand lovingly as he replied. The two blonds had soon forgotten their worries as they started planning a fishing trip and other trips they could take. The only one still worried was the quiet puppeteer.

It was hard to ignore the very clear mould creeping along the celling and the very visible cracks in the walls. The floors were either dusty or burnt, the whole place was completely run down. The corridors were smaller than the ones back in their old hideout and the three of them could no longer walk beside each other. With Hirukos clumpy body in the front and the two blonds following they walked through the house. Iris could swear it was colder here too. Thank god it was summer.

Sasori kept going as Deidara stopped at their destination but he didn't give his boyfriend any attention, instead he turned to show Iris her new room. She hated to see Sasori leave, it only made her feel more and more unwanted, but she had learned not to disturb him when he was in such a mood so she tried focusing on listening to Deidara.

The blond man opened the door with fake enthusiasm and a 'ta-da' but he cut the act off seeing his girl wasn't impressed. Her already disturbed calmness got even more shaken as she laid eyes on the room. It was very small, barely fitting the bed and the nightstand. There was no closet and plain walls, of course the walls looked to be in a little better condition then the ones she'd seen so far but it was still pretty bad. And the small window was sitting so high up that she would have to stand on the bed to reach it and the blinds.

"It's not great… It quite… It's a lot worse then you're used to, I'm sorry, hm." Deidara sighed as the two of them made their way in. "You don't even have your own bathroom, but-!" With a smile he pulled out a chest from under the bed as Iris jumped up on her sleeping place. "You can put your clothes here, just make sure it's closed so nothing crawls in, and both Sasori and I are living just across the hall if you want to sleep with us instead. We can move in an extra bed. And there's a bathroom with a shower down the hall that you and Konan share, we've excluded it just for you women so you'll have privacy. She's living just above it, hm."

Deidara shoved the chest back in under the bed, got up and stretched his back out again while seeing what Iris what thinking. It was still clear that she was troubled but seeing how much thought they had put into her feeling welcomed she just had to smile warmly. If Deidara said all would go well then all would go well, she trusted him of course.

"I can sleep here alone but if it's too cold or something I could move in with you? I'm used to sleeping alone when I visit anyways." She hummed and crawled over to the top of the bed to pull out the drawer on the nightstand. There was a box of matches and a few candles there even though there was a functional bedside lamp on the nightstand. She closed the drawer and sat back down on the bed as Deidara joined her.

"It's a lot smaller then at your moms though." He commented as Iris started playing with his long hair. "And usually you sleep with the other girls' right, hm?"

"Yeah, sure I'm used to more people..." She replied sassy. "...But I still like it better to be alone. But I can't have my own room back with mom, it would be unfair."

"Can't argue with that, hm." Deidara snorted.

"Sasori no Danna, we need to talk, hm..." Deidara said as he opened the door to his partners' new workshop. After knocking and waiting for a few minutes without a reply Deidara sighed and decided to just walk in. Sasori wouldn't open or reply; he never did that when he was in a bad mood, so he would have to take action himself. His partner was standing bend over the only table in the room with his back to the door when he walked in.

Sasori flinched when the intruder opened the door instead of going away when being ignored and spat out a sharp "About what?!"

Deidara sighed again and closed the door before walking up to his partner and lover. This was going to be a long night.


	3. Chapter 2

Sorry, this chapter might seem a little rushed because… It is. Heh!

* * *

Iris woke up the next morning by the sun sipping through the holes in the useless blinds over the tiny window. Blinds her father had last night promised to change out as fast as possible. He better stick to that promise if she was going to be able to sleep past seven.

She stayed in bed for quite some time while she slowly got used to being awake. Yesterday sure had been bad, worryingly bad. But things could only get better from here on out right? She just had to look at things with a positive attitude.

The house sure was shitty but it was summer anyways so they would probably spend most days outside, and she might even get to help with a move if the organization found a new place. Plus Pein didn't receive as many missions as before to the organization so she might get to meet a lot of the other members. She didn't always get to since they could be gone for weeks at a time and sometimes she only stayed over the weekend.

As a child she had spent a lot more time with her fathers since they probably wanted her to imprint on them and learn that they were her actual parents but as she got older, and more understanding, they didn't let her come over as much. Sometimes she felt just like a fancy toy they choose to play with rather than their child, but she also knew what kind of life they lived and that this was the best for all of them. That's was why she was so excited for this summer. It would be the first time in years that they spent so much time together.

She was going to make the most out of this summer! And to start doing so she had to get up. Unwillingly she left the bed sleepy and started her day by putting on socks before grabbing her things and heading down the corridor to the bathroom.

Since they arrived so late last night she hadn't had time to check the place out properly. She had been in the kitchen for a late dinner and in the bathroom once before they all went to bed but not much more. And she had no idea what Akatsuki members would be around. She was kind of hoping to meet Konan once since she wasn't around much normally. But now she might be and Deidara had said she was living up on the second floor! Did that mean she was actually in the building?

She quickly forgot about the other members as she opened the door to the bathroom and got in to get herself ready for the day. The early morning sun was shining brightly here too and with a pained expression she eyed the rickety shower that looked like it would break if someone turned it on. Instead she moved to wash up in the sink. It was fine for now since she showered just before leaving but once she would need an actual shower she would have to get in there. The thought of it wasn't very amusing.

Once she was clean, had fresh clothes on and had got her wavy hair under control the blond girl went back to leave her things in her room before heading to the kitchen. It was quite easy to find her way there and in the kitchen she found her dad half asleep over his coffee and breakfast. He looked so tired and didn't seem to notice her at first, but as soon as he heard her walk in he looked up with a flinch.

"Oh! Good morning, Iris, Hm." Deidara lit up with a fake smile while quickly rubbing his tired eyes to look more awake. The girl gave him a questioning look before replying to the welcoming.

She grabbed some food and joined him at the table, asking the first thing she thought as she entered the room. "Did you sleep badly?" She said taking a big portion of her fried egg.

"Wha-… Ehm, no I-" Deidara replied a bit off guard. He was always surprised to how well his daughter read people. He was used to being around Sasori and his partner sucked at that particular part. But he shouldn't be that surprised that she noticed. "Well, I didn't sleep much I guess, hm." He admitted.

"-But that won't stop us from having a super fun, family day out!" He quickly added before she had the time to question him further. "The weather is nice so if you want to go fishing right away we could do that! Oh, but we'll have to make some fishing rods first, hm."

Iris nodded and Deidara started eating again once they had agreed on making fishing rods first today. He sure was hiding something, she thought. He was being too careful and too jumpy. And after yesterday she had a pretty clear idea of where the problem were.

"Will papa join us for breakfast today?" She asked. When Deidara tensed up she knew for real that she hit the sore spot.

"Papa won't join us… He won't join us at all today actually, he-" Deidara mumbled, poking his rise around in the bowl. "He has a lot on his mind right now so it'll be best if we let him be for a while, hm."

Iris felt her heart sink a little deeper at the words, even though she had already figured out that it would come to this. Ever since they came to pick her up yesterday she had felt something was off with Sasori but she had tried to ignore it like Deidara did. She had hoped that it was just temporarily and that they would be a happy family today but apparently it wouldn't go that way.

She knew it wasn't his fault but she couldn't help being mad at Deidara too. "But you said _"both"_ of you had missed me and wanted to see me." She snapped at her father, giving him a strain narrowed look.

The expression on Deidaras face was tense and hard to read. It was going somewhere between discouragement, anger and just emptiness. "He do misses you, he's just stressed okay…" He finally sighed as he took control over his emotions and the situation again.

Seeing Deidara not put up a fight and just take the blame was the worst reaction he could give. He was a fighter so when he didn't argue did that mean he had given up? Though Iris knew she had been extra rude to him and suddenly she felt so ashamed. "Yeah, I'm sorry…" She replied quickly, hoping that could at least patch up the tension between the two of them.

Deidara just huffed and smiled relived which made her smile too. At least he wasn't mad so thankfully he didn't get offended. He probably understood how she felt and why she said such things.

The two of the quickly made up and let the subject of Sasori go completely for now. They both needed each other to be happy at the moment and that was exactly what they would do. They would do happy things and have a happy summer together. And Sasori could join in whenever he was ready.

"That was a fun day! What did you like the most, my sugar goblin? Hm." Deidara teased as he gripped Iris around the waist and pulled her into his arms. The two of them crashed down on the girls' bed laughing and Deidara started tickling his poor daughter instead of letting her reply to the question.

Iris burst out laughing even louder and cried a tear while pushing her fathers' face away from her as he came too close to her tummy. "You're embarrassing!" She squealed. "I'm not a baby, don't do that! DAAAD!"

Deidara earned himself a light fist to the face, and while laughing hard at the action he let go to rub his cheek pretending that it hurt. "You got some fire in your punches, hun. I hope you haven't been fighting with the other kids! That wouldn't be a fair fight, hm!"

Iris rolled out of her dads light hold and laid down on her back while holding her sleeping t-shirt hard just in case her dad would do a surprise attack. "I don't! I'm a pacifist unlike you!" She giggled.

Deidara quickly laid down beside her still grinning brightly and chuckling softly. "I don't get how you got like this, must be your mom, hm. Now tell me, what was most fun today?"

Iris passionately spoke about their day and their visit to the nearby village for the next ten minutes. Deidara held her in his arms, cuddling. He sure had missed this, just holding his child while she talked away. When she was talking to Deidara she could go on for hours. He brought that side out of her.

Normally they could talk right across each other, something they had done the entire day actually, but now when it was evening Deidara felt how little he had actually slept the night before so he was rather quiet.

"Dad, you're snoring." Iris suddenly muttered and Deidara tried to open his tired eyes that had at some point started falling shut.

"No, I wasn't, hm." He mumbled back and hugged her tighter in his arms. "I was just focusing."

Iris snorted and bent her arm out to start petting her fathers' blonds' long hair. "Then tell me a story."

"What do you want to hear?" Deidara replied with a yawn. He had once again relaxed into the bed but he opened one eye lazily to look at the cute face staring back at him.

Iris tried not to lose her smile as she stared intensely at her father. "Tell me something about us three. With papa…"

She was worried that Deidara would take it as an insult that she asked for that after she had just spent the day with him but he just sighed and closed his eyes again with a tired smile. "What about that time you…"

" _Sasori! I lost her, hm!" Deidara yelped as he swung the door to his partners' workshop open._

 _Sasori turned around, giving his lover a tired, disgusted look. "Deidara, she's two, she barley walks and you…?"_

" _Yes! I know! I suck, just help me, hm!" Deidara interrupted while gestured his arms and motioned for him to come with him._

 _Sasori sighed deeply and rubbed his temple as he got up and grabbed his cloak. He swiftly threw it on and started button it up as the two of them left the open door behind and started walking down the corridor._

" _Where did you last see her? What were you doing?" Sasori questioned the worried blond as they started tracing back Deidaras' steps._

" _We were playing and she got hungry so I was going to fix her something to eat but when I turned around he had walked off, hm."_

" _Use the food to lure her out?"_

" _She's not a dog, Danna."_

 _Sasori stopped and grabbed Deidaras cloak with another deep sigh. "I know, but you shouldn't have let her out of your sight. Why didn't you come get me before you started cocking?"_

 _Deidaras face cringed up like he was about to cry and he pulled his arm loose to take a step back. "Oh! But I thought you didn't want to, hm!"He spat out sarcastically._

 _Sasori took a step back as well, quiet, like he was surprised. But the little emotion on his face could have been any. It was hard to tell._

" _I wanted to be able to handle her myself but I couldn't." Deidara sighed to break the silence. He didn't feel like waiting around for a reply that probably wouldn't even come. "I know a child was my request but you agreed to have her and you're the main reason we actually got her, so I just thought you would have WANTED to be a part of raising her without me having to ask you all the time, hm."_

 _When Sasori didn't reply again he continued. "And while we we're playing she kept asking for you, she wants you to be a part of our family too. But if we don't find her I don't know what will happe-"_

" _Shut up." Sasori suddenly said with widen eyes, cutting Deidara off. The blond looked at him even more hurt before he got grabbed again and Sasori started running back the direction they came from._

" _Did you close the door to my workshop?" The puppet asked with a tone that could have been worry._

 _Deidara replied 'no' confused and he could feel how Sasori speed up his steps at the answer._

" _And you said she wanted to see me?" Sasori asked. Again, Deidara replied confused but it quickly hit him too._

" _You don't think she-"_

" _She's really smart for her age, she knows where it is…"_

 _The two artists stopped abruptly at the open workshop door and when they couldn't spot her right away they dashed in together._

" _IRIS!" Both yelled, startling the toddler that turned around confused with a wooden finger in her mouth._

 _Deidara lit up happily and relived to have found her so quickly but Sasori took action and ran up to her, picking her up and pulling the finger away from her._

" _Where did you find this?!" He cried waving the finger in front of the blond girl that didn't seem to understand what he wanted. "You're not allowed in here, young lady! This could have been poisonous! What were you thinking?!"_

 _Deidara walked up to the two of them to get Sasori to stop yelling. "She doesn't understand you, you'll just scare he-" He started but quickly cut himself short as he saw his daughter be angry and not scared there in the arms of her father._

" _You're a poo-poo-head!" She yelled and started beating Sasoris chest for not letting her play anymore. Deidara instantly cracked up as his partners mouth fell open in shock and he could see the anger twitch in his eyes._

" _YOU'RE a poo-poo-head!" Sasori yelled back, so taken aback by the simple insult that he couldn't come up with anything better. He quickly started walking out the room with the screaming girl in his arms, Deidara followed them out half bend in laughter and making sure the door was shut behind them this time._

" _Are you sure she asked for me?" Sasori asked Deidara, chucking amused as the kid refused to listen to him._


	4. Chapter 3

Side note for those who know Iris from earlier works I've made. If some things don't add up between this and the old stuff then you can just assume that this fic is "canon". I've had to make some minor changes so things make sense and to keep it logical, but don't worry; you probably won't even notice the changes. Have a nice read! ^^

* * *

Day two in the new house and it started much like day one. Iris mumbled angrily under her breath as the sun once again had woken her. They had forgotten to buy new material for the blinds yesterday so they were still the old broken ones and they were letting in sunlight. Couldn't they just take one of the Akatsuki cloaks as compensation for now…

Since she couldn't get back to sleep she thought that she might as well get up and get ready. Just like yesterday she started with taking another quick trip to the bathroom. Once she was done she left her things back in her room and exited left for the kitchen.

The young blond was surprised to find the room empty and untouched. She had assumed that her dads´, or at least one of them, would already be here with food ready.

If they weren't here, or well if Deidara wasn't here since she had given up on thinking that Sasori would be too, then he must still be in bed. He wouldn't leave the house without telling her, right? Or at least leave a note. She made a sharp turn out the room again and headed down the hall to her fathers' bedroom, a little bit less exited but the girl did everything to not loose the little good feeling she still had.

Iris knocked and felt the door right after. Since it was unlocked she didn't bother to wait for a reply and just stepped in. The lights were still off and it seemed like there was only one individual in the bed. Not a surprise there as well.

"Good morning, dad." She said softly as she sat down on the side of the bed and gently stroked the blond mess of hair that was poking out from the top of the covers. Deidara mumbled a little at the touch so she figured she had woken him up, and he didn't speak until a few minute later when he had regained consciousness.

Deidara tumbled around and rolled over to his back so he could face the girl sitting at his side. "Good morning, sunshine." He smiled lovingly once he got his eyes open and she instantly smiled back. "I'm sorry I haven't made breakfast yet, I was just so sleepy, hm."

The girl shook her head calming and turned around a little so that she could join her father in the bed. "That's okay. I'm glad you're getting sleep. You really seem to need it."

Deidara unwillingly moved to make space for her. Not because he didn't want her there, it just bothered him that she had notice that he wasn't in great shape. He really didn't want to explain how he had been fighting with Sasori the last few nights. And how he had been in bed for hours after, worrying and crying.

Deidara surprised his daughter when he suddenly pulled her into his arms, squeezing her tight and burrowing his nose into her new-brushed hair. Iris didn't really know what had pushed him to so suddenly crave her comfort but she decided not to ask and just hugged him back calmly.

After a while of cuddling Deidara finally broke the silence. "Hey, what do you say about letting me get some clothes on then we go make breakfast, hm?"

"Dad, you're the one holding _me_ down." Iris said rolling her eyes. The blond man chuckled and let his grip of her loosen up so she could move.

They both sat up and the old man brushed his hair out of his eye so he could start his dressing process. "Oh! Honey, I forgot I bought something for you from the old base." He said with a new twinkle in his eye. "Check the top drawer of my desk over there. I couldn't save all the clothes you had left with us but I save something, hm."

Unsure and curious the blond girl got up and skipped over to the desk. He father left the bed shortly after and went to the closet to find clothes as she pulled out the drawer.

Iris couldn't help to yelp happily as she picked up a hand made plush doll of herself and held it carefully in her hands. It was a doll Sasori had made for her when she was much younger and she had carried it everywhere for years, pretending it to be her twin, but when she got older she had forgotten about it and she guested Deidara had placed it somewhere for safekeeping after she had abandoned it.

"It's mini me! Where did you keep her?" She asked, turning around to her father who was half-way into his shirt.

Deidara didn't reply right away and instead he went up to her to fish out a scroll from the same drawer. "I've kept a baby memory collection of you over the years. We can look at it later if you want but I thought that was the most important part to you, hm."

Iris eyed the scroll impressed and nodded sharply as a reply. Deidara placed the scroll back into the box and went back to dressing. "Don't loose her now. I mean it's your doll but… I would be sad if you did, hm." He added warmly.

The two of them spend yet another day together, laughing, catching up, bonding and had just as much fun as they had expected to have. After eating they had finally headed out to fish and they had been quite lucky. Once they returned they headed right away to the kitchen to make their draught into a feast. The smell of freshly cooked fish had spread out in the house and soon after a few familiar faces had joined them.

Iris was so exited to see that the whole group showed up to this dinner. Or there was one exception but she had at this point forgotten about her father neglect to her presents and she was so caught in the happy environment that it didn't matter.

Pein wasn't eating but he was nice company. She liked him but she didn't like that he was there. It usually didn't mean good. After about forty minutes he announced that they would hold a meeting after dinner and Iris instantly understood why he had joined them. He was only here because everyone else was and he needed to announce this information to everyone.

"Deidara, I need you to go grab Sasori after dinner. He's already informed, I just told him you would pick him up when it was time." Pein casually added right after his announcement. Deidaras' smile flickered out as fast as a candle and he put down his cutlery to nod seriously. The room got quiet for a while and the mood got tense, but Deidara refused to let it stay that way.

"Iris! I almost forgot but your birthday is coming up soon! We haven't had you here since your tenth birthday, what do you think we should do, hm?"

Everyone lit up and burst out talking at the same time, some tried to ask the small girl what she wanted and some just randomly threw out ideas for a party.

"She's turning sixteen now isn't she?" She heard someone ask loudly. Another one replied to it before she could locate who it was that had asked. She got distracted quickly by trying to keep up with who said what so she just forgot about Deidaras' worried expression in the panic of socializing. Her dad sure was good at avoiding his issues.

"Aww man! I remember when you were this tiny!" Hidan suddenly exclaimed, showing the height between his hands. The room filled with warm laughter and Iris hid her face in her hands from being so embarrassed to be the center of attention.

Deidara puffed her to see if she was sad but he stopped worrying when he saw how she was grinning behind her hands. The members were now talking about memories they had about the kid running around the house back in ame. "Well, I got things to set up." Pein mumbled and got up. 'He lasted almost a hour´ Iris thought as she looked up amused as he left.

Since all members had left after dinner to go to the meeting, Iris had volunteered to do the dishes. But she finished that rather quickly and since no one was around she headed back to her bedroom where she cuddled up in her bed with a book and mini Iris leaning on her shoulder.

As her chapter ended she cast a look at the doll leaning on her and decided to close her book to study it more thoroughly. It was clearly well used but still in rather good shape. And it smelled just like her dads and the old house. She missed the old house she admitted to herself.

And she was surprised that she still remembered getting the doll. She had been so happy all day. Things sure were easier back when you were a kid. Give a kid a doll and she'll play nicely for the rest of the week.

She huffed amused at the thought and rolled deeper down on her back while raising the doll up towards the celling. Well, she hadn't changed that much. If someone gave her a book she would shut up until she had finished it.

The girl yawned and put the doll back on her bed. Maybe she should just give up for tonight and go to sleep. Sure she liked the solitude but she was here to spend time with her fathers after all so being alone was a little boring.

She got up and grabbed her things before heading to the bathroom like usual. It didn't take long before she was done and was about to head back to her room but as she exited the bathroom she heard steps and loud voices coming from down the hall. She wasn't sure but the voices sounded a lot like her dads. She was at least sure it was two men arguing.

She didn't know if she should follow and see what it was so she just stood there in the hall quietly to try and hear more. The voices was cut off by a door slamming shut and after that the corridor went quiet. It took her a few moments before she decided not to follow after and to ignore it again. She had been ignoring a lot lately so why stop here. What good would it do to spy anyways?

As she went back to her room on heavy legs she thought more about what was going on even thought she really just wanted to ignore it. Was she doing wrong in not seeking out the truth? Was it wrong of her to not engage? Deidara seemed unhappy. Sasori seemed unhappy. Were they…?

She stopped right outside her door, not feeling strong enough to open it. Were they fighting? Did Deidara go to Sasoris workshop every night to argue? It would explain why he didn't sleep…

But she had no idea what was up with Sasori. She hadn't seen him since she got here, only Hiruko. What could he possibly be angry at? Her eyes widen is horror as she found a reason that fitted. He didn't want her there.

Did he not actually love her? Was he stressed that she was there? It must be her fault. If they broke up it would be her fault. She grabbed the handle to the door hard and dashed in, quickly stuffing her things away and getting in under the covers with her doll as the tears started falling.

Maybe she was just tired and overthinking it…

" _Dad, dad! Play with me!" The four-year-old girl chirped as she bounced up and down beside the reading redhead. With her tiny hands she was holding the doll she had gotten just a few days ago._

" _Mm… In a minute, I just what to finish- where did Deidara-dad go?" Sasori mumbled and looked up as he realized the blond wasn't around anymore. He hadn't even notice as he left, had he told him he left?_

 _Iris had gotten tired off jumping and had instead started to try and climb up in her fathers lap as she replied. "He went to buy food. I wanted grapes!"_

 _Sasori looked down tired on the child and picked her up. "He sure is spoiling you…" He said as he had put the girl in his lap so she would face him. They had an intense stare-down for a few seconds before Sasori added. "And I'm papa, not dad."_

 _Iris seemed to not pay attention to what Sasori just had said and turned around to slam her free hand on the book while the other held the doll tight. "What are you reading?!"_

" _It's a book your mom gave me. She said it could be of help when raising children." Sasori replied patiently. "But it won't help if you won't let me read."_

 _Iris stared at the book for a few minutes before she turned back to look at her father. "But why read about how to play with me when you can play with me?"_

 _Sasori looked honestly chocked at the remark the kid just had made. He sat quite for a minute more, maybe a bit embarrassed, and now it was Iris time to wait patiently._

" _What do you want to play then?" He asked carefully, probably hoping for nothing too complicated._

 _Iris climbed down again and Sasori watched her run across the room to grab one of her books and running back. "We can read together!" She grinned as she held up the book so proud that she dropped the doll in excitement._


	5. Chapter 4

I hope to god you guys can follow this messy story, coz mostly I'm writing it last minute and I may or may not have missed some plot points. I'm not that good at writing.

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" _You sure look happy. Did you have fun while I was gone, hm?" Deidara asked with a soft smirk as he entered his and Sosoris´ bedroom._

 _The puppet was leaning on the backboard of the bed with the young girl sleeping on his chest. He had put the book to the side and placed a blanked over her and himself and now he was just quietly watching his little miracle sleep._

" _She blew out like a candle after two chapters." Sasori replied without taking his eyes of the girl. Deidara put the bag of groceries down on the floor and carefully took off his shoes before crawling up on Sasoris, daughter free, side._

" _Sooo, what do you think about having a kid?" Deidara asked low and close to Sasoris ear so he wouldn't disturb little Iris as she were clutching to her doll and her father in her sleep._

" _It's one of the best decisions we've made." Sasori whispered while gently stroking the girls' wavy blond hair._

Iris woke up quite abruptly the next day, realizing that she must have passed out somewhere in the middle of her breakdown. She rubbed her eyes intensely to break them open and she leaned up to take a quick look around the room. It was a bit cloudy today it seemed since it wasn't as bright as the past days but it was still pretty lit.

She tumbled around onto her back and tried to think back to last night. She had been beating herself up pretty badly and blaming herself for things she probably had no control over anyways. She had been overreacting surely, she had just been tired.

´That's right, it's not my fault that papa is stressed…´ She thought to herself, but she could feel the lack of confidence in the statement.

Since she was terrified to be alone with her own thoughts for another moment, she got up and went to the bathroom as fast as possible. After carefully making sure the shower would hold when being turned on, she took a nice, long, hot shower. She was so glad they had hot water, the steamy room calmed her down and it didn't feel as scary as before. She didn't feel scared over using the shower here anymore and she didn't feel scared of facing her dads' again. She had after all been over thinking it.

Instead of heading to the kitchen this morning, or to straight go and see if Deidara was still asleep, she decided to go and say good morning to Kakuzu. She had been talking to him a little at the dinner table but since everyone wanted to talk to her, because it was the first time they all saw her in months and her presents probably made them forget about the five great nations attack, she hadn't really talked _enough_ with him. And it would be cozy to eat breakfast with him.

Iris knocked carefully on the door that was primed with a piece of paper with Kakuzus and Hidans names written on it. She waited for a while and got a bit uneasy when no one opened. If this was her dads' room she would have walked in but it wasn't…

She knocked again, a little longer and a little louder. Nothing happened. She decided to give up but just as she was about to leave she heard something move on the other side. She took a step back as the door flung open and a tired Hidan stood there in only his underwear and a pair of socks, rubbing his eyes to wake them up.

"Huh, Iris…. Morning." He mumbled and leaned on the doorframe so he wouldn't have to stand on his own. "What brings you here?"

The girl would have been more flustered if she wasn't used to seeing the jashinist bare chest pretty much all the time. Instead she tried to as discreetly as possible look past the man into the room behind him. "Is Kakuzu here?" She asked to answer his question.

Hidan stared at her intrigued and looked back into the room with her. "Noo. He went to Peins office early; think they're talking money so he should be busy awhile. Something I can help with?"

Iris tried to not look as disappointed as Hidan stared her down. He was so much taller than her so even when he was leaning on the frame he had to look down. "Ehm, you can if you want to eat breakfast with me but I guess you were sleeping…"

Hidan started grinning and ran his hand through the girls' hair, startling her a little. "Let me just get some pants." He said still grinning.

"If I've talked to Sasori recently…? Hum no, no I haven't…" Hidan mumbles as a reply to Iris careful questioning. She nodded understanding and continued eating her food. Hidan figured this was bothering her and that she might want to talk more about it. "What's up with him?"

Iris didn't answer but he wasn't ready to give up just yet. "Are you okay? Have you talked to him?"

The girl could feel her hand tremble a little and she put down her cutlery on the table. She wanted to talk to Kakuzu but Hidan was being nice and asked, she couldn't just ignore him. "No, he hasn't talk to me since I got here… It's been almost three days; do you think he's avoiding me?"

Hidan was a bit surprised but he tried not to look it so much. He knew Sasori could avoid people but he had only ever said good things about his daughter. If he was avoiding her it couldn't be her fault at least.

"I'm sure he's not, he fucking adores you." He smiled warmly. Iris looked skeptical at him but his smile seemed true. He wasn't lying to make her feel better, or at least he believed strongly on his words.

"Yeah, thanks." She smiled back, feeling again a little better. "Do you think I should go talk to him?"

Hidan swallowed his warm drink and then suggested that maybe she could wait till tonight? Sasori might take a break from whatever he was doing as night fell and if it got awkward she could just used the excuse that she wanted to say goodnight.

Iris lit up. "That's a smart move!" Hidan laughed and joked about how it sounded like she was surprised he was smart. She promised him that that wasn't the case and they had a good laugh for a few more minutes.

She was about to ask him if he had noticed some tension between Sasori and Deidara too but just before she did Deidara entered the kitchen, looking happy but tired. She didn't want to ask when he was here and seeing Hidan hadn't talked much to Sasori recently he probably hadn't talked much to Deidara either. Instead she let the thought go and enjoyed the rest of the day as well as she could.

Night came around and after dinner Deidara excused himself to go handle some business but Iris didn't mind, she just headed back to her room and read. She had been with her dad all day anyways and needed the rest. She easily spent two hours reading but after she ended her book she yawned and decided that it was time for bed.

Her heart made a volt in her chest as she remembered this morning and she carefully put the book to the side as she got up from her bed. It shouldn't be this scary to confront- talk to her father. He wasn't a scary person really, he was. He was Sasori.

She shook her head furiously and left the room to go to him. She was being ridiculous. She had been all day. She would just go to him, say she wanted to stop by and say good night, they might hug or have a short awkward conversation and she would go back to bed.

Iris chakra level had always been pretty low but she still felt like concealing it as she walked down the corridor to her father's workshop. Why did she feel like she had to sneak? She wasn't doing anything wrong. But it somehow felt wrong. She felt like she shouldn't be here. And she got more and more worried the closer to the room she got since she could hear angry voices coming from it.

The girl stopped right at the door and now that she was this close there was no mistaken in who was arguing on the other side. "And another thing, Sasori-!" Deidara yelled. "I'm tired of runing errands for you, if you want something from our room, go get it yourself, hm!"

"I asked you for ONE THING, Deidara! I didn't think that was too harsh on you!" Sasori yelled back.

"You always say "it's just one thing" but asking for multiple things at different occasions still counts as MULTIPLE THINGS! Stop trying to blame me for everything! I have reasons to be mad, YOU DON'T!"

Iris was terrified to move. She wasn't going to knock and interrupt. She probably should have done that but she just couldn't. And she couldn't move away and leave. What if they said something about her! She had to know if she was the reason they hated each other.

"I don't have reasons?!" Sasori exclaimed back loudly, startling the girl outside a little. "I do have reasons! You wouldn't understand-!"

"Then MAKE ME understand, hm!" Deidara pledged with his tone so hopeless. "What- why- why can't you just trust me?! You used to trust me-!"

"Don't tell me what I did and what I do! I still trust you, but I don't need you, I need to be alone!" Sasori countered. His tone seemed pretty hopeless as well.

If she could see into the room she would have seen the anger in Deidaras eyes at the last statement. "You need to be alone? You always need to be ALONE! I'm sick of it! You neglect me! You neglect your child-! You neglect your job just because you don't know how to function like a sane human being! When was the last time you looked at me with something else then hate?! When was the last time you touched me-"

Deidaras' sentence was cut short by what sounded like a bag of flower hitting the floor. Iris slapped her hands over her mouth to hold herself from yelping.

"ENOUGH!" Sasori screamed while the other man assumingly lost balance and stumbled into what sounded like boxes of tools or puppet parts. "You want me to touch you?! Oh, I'll touch you!"

Iris bit her lip and flinched when there was another punch, or maybe kick, launched against Deidara. She could hear the loud pained wails he made at the impact and how Sasori didn't seem to stop there. It was torture to hear. Sasori was definitely hurting Deidara and Deidara made no attempt to stop him.

She had heard more then she could take and out of nowhere her legs decided to run away. She ran down the corridor back to her room as fast as she could while her eyes filled up on tears. What should she have done? Should she have broken in and stopped it? Would Sasori have listened to her? Would she have to have battled her father to protect her other father? Would she have had to try and kill him to stop him?

She ripped her door open and slammed it after her as she hid in her room. There was no way she could go up against Sasori. She couldn't protect Deidara; she didn't understand what was going on anyways and she didn't want to anymore. She wanted it to be over, she hated them both. They were terrible parents. And soon one of them might be dead…


	6. Chapter 5

This chapter is a bit _?_ to me coz I tried to fix everything I had been explaining badly before and I did a terrible job at it. I still hope though that you get anything out from this fic! Have a nice read!

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Iris woke up the next morning to find herself on top of her made bed, still fully dressed and her makeup cried out and stained on her pillow. She carefully leaned up on her elbows, wondering when she fell asleep and how she could have fallen asleep while crying so violently.

Since she had to blow her nose she got up and went to the bathroom. At first she was quite calm, just cleaning herself up, but then she realized that she didn't actually know what happened after she left last night. And suddenly she was terrified again. She had to find Deidara!

The girl ran back and dashed into her dads' bedroom, not caring for knocking or thinking about the consequences. She stood in the door for a second to catch her breath and to get a grip over the situation, and as she did her eyes fell on the bed where her dad was. He was tucked in and only his blond hair showed so she couldn't really tell if he was breathing. But he being here must mean that he had moved here himself or Sasori must have moved him. Could this be a good sign? Did it really all happen or had it just been a dream? Maybe he wasn't hurt?

It was useless to stand around wondering when she could go up and check on him. It pained her heart so when the man turned around sleepy as she woke him up, his face was bruised and his right eye was swallowed, plus the parts of his body that she saw under his t-shirt and the covers were in much worse shape than his face.

Iris broke down crying again, being so scared but relieved that he was alive, and she hugged the newly awoken man around the neck. She was so mad at herself. Maybe she could have stopped this if she just had busted in last night, she had been a coward.

Deidara was confused to why Iris was so worried. Or it made sense since he was beaten up pretty badly but how did she know he was? She had run in here like she was aware of his state already. He carefully hugged her back and petted her back calming. He slowly made up a picture in his head of how she had found out. He didn't want to accuse her of anything but he had to ask about it. "How did you know…?"

Iris broke away from the hug and instead of replying she tried to get a closer look at his wounds, but Deidara pulled himself away and grabbed a bunch of napkins to dry his crying daughter with. She frowned but since she was so weak from crying she didn't really fight it.

Once she had calmed down she admitted that she had been eavesdropping last night. "H-how much did you hear? How long did you stay?" Deidara asked carefully and breathed out relived as she said she had left just as the beating had started.

"Why is papa so angry? Why would he do this to you?" She cried as she collected herself again. Deidara looked away, to ashamed to look at her. He couldn't give her a reply, he didn't know and she didn't need to think about it anyways.

"I don't know…" He said. "But it's nothing you need to worry about. I might not be in shape to entertain you today but I'll give you money to go buy new books if you want-"

Iris boiled up with anger and didn't let Deidara finish. She'd had enough from both of them. Who cares if they fought because of her or not, this was not acceptable in any way. "Why are you protecting him, dad?!" She screamed standing up quickly. "He's hurting you, he's hurting US and he won't tell us why! It's not your fault! You don't have to fix him, hm!""

She stopped herself as she heard the grunt escape her mouth and sat back down on the bed a bit baffled. Sometimes it just slipped out, mostly when she had been around Deidara for a longer period. And sometimes just when she was angry.

Deidara looked quite shocked and lost too from the sudden verbal attack but he didn't let it stop him from trying to get her to calm down.

Iris tensed up as Deidara touched her again and she got up from the bed to get away from her dad.

"Iris..." Deidara pledged and stretched out a hand to her but she just took another step back, away from him.

"No… You're terrible!" She snapped. She didn't mean it. Sasori was the main problem! But Deidara was siding with him in his own weird way and that made him the enemy too. She didn't care anymore if their fight was about her or something else. She just couldn't stay with them anymore, she needed to get out.

"Can you at least go fetch me Kakuzu? I need a doctor, hm." Deidara finally sighed after a while when the girl didn't seem to have more to say.

Iris spent the rest of the day avoiding everyone. She was outside most of the day. It was windy but she just took a jacket and tried to stay around the trees to try and avoid the breeze.

She didn't like being here anymore. She didn't want her dads' to break up, or murder each other, or just fight! But it seemed like nothing could stop them. At first she thought about just going back to her moms place without telling anyone but she knew they would come after her. And she didn't want that.

She was in her bed, cuddling mini Iris and thinking about what to do when it hit her. She would run away. She would start a new life in some other nation, she had no idea how she would get money but she had always wanted to be a writer. Maybe she would get ideas while she was traveling and she could start writing. And in the meantime she could work at a store or something. She would find something.

She got up right away and snuck out of her room, the corridors were silent and empty, it was rather late after all, so she didn't have to sneak. But she was going to steal so she wanted to be careful.

After twenty minutes she found the Akatsukis supply room. It was much smaller than their old, no surprise there, but they still had what she needed. She grabbed a tent, a sleeping bag and some cooking tools and quickly went back to her room. She started repacking her backpack and attached the tent on the outside of the backpack as it didn't fit inside. She also had to get rid of a lot of stuff to make room, but she managed. She would have to get new stuff on the way and a new, stronger and bigger backpack.

Lastly she went to her father. Deidara was still in bed, he had been all day after Kakuzu had fixed him up, but he was more than happy to see her. She apologized for earlier and hugged it out with him. He didn't seem to notice how fake she was being about it. They talked for a while and after she got him to trust her she asked him if she couldn't get that book money anyways, lying that Kakuzu had promised to go shopping with her tomorrow.

He gladly gave her it and some extra for clothes. "Do you have anything pretty for your birthday? No? Then you should get something, hm." He said.

She felt so tainted when she left the bedroom. Lying to get money and stealing from the barley living organization. But she had to go; she had to get out of there.

The next morning she went up before sunrise. Everything was packed and she left the house before anyone had the chance to wake up. She left mini Iris on her bed with the books she had left behind. She didn't want to accidently ruin her.

 _The young girl watched fascinated as the blond man kneaded the clay between his hands and then released a bunch of butterflies from his grip. She laughed as she watched them fly around and she laughed even louder as they blew up in small explosions, like small colorful fireworks._

" _Will you teach me how to do that?" She asked her father exited as he held out some of the clay for her too._

" _Of course. It's in your blood, Iris, hm!"_

" _Why can't she do it, Sasori no Danna?" Deidara asked his partner concerned. He was holding the child in his arms; she was just as confused as her father. They had been trying for weeks but she hadn't been able to conjure anything._

 _Sasori looked at the chart and then at the two blonds with cringe eyebrows. "I don't know really… She should be able too; she had the right DNA for it but… I think her chakra is too weak. It's the only thing that makes sense at least."_

" _Can we do anything about it? Can we…?" Deidara asked but he quiet down seeing that Sasoris worried face didn't change._

 _He put the chart to the side and sighed. "I can test her more but I don't know if we'll learn anything. Maybe I should compare here to you and see what she's missing but… I don't really know what I have to work with here."_

 _Iris looked at the two men a bit scared. She didn't understand but she didn't like the tone they were using. "What does that mean?" She asked. It was Sasori who replied._

" _It means that you probably won't be able to make clay bombs." When she still didn't understand he added. "Clay animals."_

" _NO! I WANT TO, HM! DAD!" She cried and slammed her fists on Deidara chest, looking up on him for support._

" _I'm sorry; honey but there's nothing I can do, hm." He said and the girl started violently cry, shocking both men._

" _Iris, calm down!" Sasori tried to no use._

" _It's going to be okay, hm!" Deidara tried._

 _For many days the girl refused to listen to her fathers and nothing they did seemed to cheer her up. But when all hope was lost Sasori tried his last triumph card. With the help of a small wooden puppet he put up a little show. A show that was, unintentionally, very alike the show his grandmother once had used on him._

" _If you want I can teach you this." He said as Iris fascinated played with the self walking doll. She looked up on him with big hazel eyes._

" _Will I be able to do this?" She asked carefully, she didn't want to get her heart broken again._

" _Yes. It requires no special skill, but if you master it you can make great things with it."_

 _The puppet was sitting quietly on the floor, waiting for her to process the new information. And he felt his heart warm up as she agreed to learn._

" _Papa, I don't- I don't want to be a puppeteer." Iris said and waited tensed for her father's reply._

 _She couldn't really read his face; she couldn't read him that much in general actually. Besides they mostly just saw each other when they trained nowadays and he was such a serious teacher._

 _She missed the easy going happy dad he used to be but, he said that he wanted to use his time get work done and she respected that but… If she gave up on the puppets he might not want to train her anymore and she might lose the last link she had to him. But she also really didn't want to be a puppeteer._

" _Okay. But we'll still do training." He replied and she sighed deeply feeling so relived. "So you still want to be a bomber?" He added._

" _What?! No, no!" She exclaimed nervously. She barley even remembered wanting that as a child. "I just don't like welding puppets. They're clumsy and heavy and…"_

 _She stopped herself midsentence since she had just insulted his works but he just nodded understanding. "Well, you chakra might be too weak to carry them and that's why they feel heavy. But not using puppet shouldn't have to stop you from using the puppet jutsu."_

 _She stared at him confused and he took a step closer to gently put his hand on her shoulder. "I want you to find your own path. Find a weapon you like and wield it with the jutsu. Use the jutsu as a part of yourself, like an extra arm. Do you think you could do that?"_

 _She stared at him amazed with a weird smile. "Ehm… Yea, I could probably find something..."_

" _Then that will be your new homework." Sasori smiled back. "I want you to find "your" weapon till our next training session."_

 _Somehow she actually felt a little closer to him after that._


	7. Chapter 6

Note: This chapter is a step back in the story. I decided to do a quick recap of everything up until now but from Deidara perspective because one, I've taken such a long break from this story that it might need a little background and I feel I haven't really covered Deidara and his take on it enough. I haven't done that with Sasori either but he will be explained later on. So just bear with me and enjoy Deidara for now!

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"You're walking awfully fast for Hiruko, hm." The blond noted after the two of them, the two artist, had left the new hideout and had headed to pick up their daughter for the summer. They had been walking silently up until now, both seemed to want it that way, but Deidara was annoyed. And he wanted to take his anger out on the other.

"You're awfully quiet for someone with four mouths." Sasori only replied. Something he often said and right now it was a maneuver to avoid keeping this conversation going. Something that really displeased Deidara at the moment but he didn't say anything. He was much more mature now after all. He knew when to shut up. Though Sasori hadn't seemed to change anything during the twenty years they had been working together. Of course he hadn't. He was an immortal puppet, stuck in a child's body and stuck in a child's mind too apparently. Of course he had changed more and more as they had spent time together but recently he had been going back to his old self. He acted again like during the first years, when they weren't dating. It was horrible and scary, and Deidara hated it.

Deidara huffed out a tired sigh and turned his head away while they walked on. They walked on for a while longer, Sasori was waiting for the blond to get mad but it never came. In contrast to himself he acted like someone completely new, not at all like the brat he had once gotten to know. He had grown up, and he didn't fight it anymore. Just like Deidara found Sasoris new-old behavior uncomfortable Sasori found Deidaras new-new behavior uncomfortable. So since the fight wasn't getting more fuel right now Sasori actually slowed down a bit. Granting a confused look from his partner.

"Promise me you'll be around when she stays with us." Deidara said after a while to break the silence. Sasori only gave him a meaning look before his eyes hit the road again. Not a pleasing reply but Deidara knew that was the most he would get out of him right now. "Don't do it for me, do it for her, hm."

The blond man was just returning after a heated argument with his partner and his steps echoed loudly through the halls, though he slowed down his steps outside his daughters' room to make sure she didn't wake up and quickly dashed in to his bedroom. He had been holding his anger down all day but had finally burst and gone to vent at Sasori. The puppeteer only seemed to enjoy it though, like he found some sick pleasure in Deidaras heartbroken state. Little did he know that the reason Sasori was satisfied was that he saw his boyfriend act more like himself and it had calmed him down. Sasori would never admit it to Deidara and so he would never know, he was only left more frustrated then before.

The younger artist fell face down onto his bed, tired, sad, and just beat. He hadn't gotten anything out of Sasori today either.

Trying to get him to talk was just as rewarding as talking to a wall. The man clutched the pillow in front of his face and just let himself blubber his last strength away. He wanted to be held, he felt small and was scared. Sasori was his security and he didn't have that anymore. Or at least not now. And Iris was his pure little ray of sunshine. He couldn't cloud her with anything dark, no she needed to always be happy. But right now he had nowhere to turn. Everything was turned upside down. He hadn't felt this alone since he left Iwa. Before he joined Akatsuki and before he had felt a sense of purpose.

She was worried about him. She wasn't supposed to worry about him, he was supposed to worry about her. The blond put on his fake smile and told her everything was fine, he needed to direct her attention to anything else. And it went well, all day he kept the façade up. They had fun together. They felt like a family. But he missed him too so, so very much. He saw she was worried about and missed him too. She shouldn't miss him, and she wasn't allowed to worry. He had to do something about it.

"She asked about you today. I thought you said you would come for her sake." Deidara said snidely as he was leaning on the wall in Sasoris workshop later that night, the puppet was sitting down at the desk, focusing hard on the work he had before him under the strong table lamp.

"I never said that, you did." He pointed out without as much lifting his eyes from his work. Instead he waved his hand needy in the other man's direction. "If you want to be useful could you get that thing- you know, the little metal thing I picked up the other day? I forgot it back in Hiruko."

Deidara just sighed and got up for his lean. He didn't have the energy tonight to argue. The task was simple after all. He did it quick and then spent a few more hours just sitting beside the hard working puppet, trying to understand what he was doing that was so important.

The next day he was woken up by his sunshine, Iris. He didn't remember when he had finally gone back to bed last night but he couldn't have gotten many hours of sleep. But seeing her face made his heart warm. He was ashamed for not being all he could be for her but he was glad she was here and awake and happy and healthy.

The blond man startled the young girl when he grabbed her and held her tight. He was in so much need of contact that it hurt. It hurt how much he missed her when she was gone and it hurt how gone Sasori was. Everything just hurt all the time and he was alone about it too. He was carrying so much pain.

But he did what he always did and swallowed that pain himself. The days were easier to handle after all. "Hey, what do you say about letting me get some clothes on then we go make breakfast, hm?" He said with a tired, smiley huff.

"Dad, you're the one holding _me_ down." Iris replied, rolling her eyes.

"And another thing, Sasori-!" Deidara yelled. "I'm tired to run errands for you, if you want something from our room, go get it yourself, hm!"

"I asked you for ONE THING, Deidara! I didn't think that was too harsh on you!" Sasori yelled back.

"You always say "it's just one thing" but asking for multiple things at different occasions still counts as MULTIPLE THINGS! Stop trying to blame me for everything! I have reasons to be mad, YOU DON'T!"

Two nights. Two nights they had spent yelling at each other. Much like the nights AND days between the Ame attack and the day they had gone to go pick up Iris. Deidara had had enough. He had had enough for a long time now but he was finally too weak to ignore it anymore. And so Sasori needed to know that everything was his fault.

"You need to be alone? You always need to be ALONE! I'm sick of it! You neglect me! You neglect your child-! You neglect your job just because you don't know how to function like a sane human being! When was the last time you looked at me with something else then hate?! When was the last time you touched me-"

A fist was launched towards Deidara face before he could finish his sentence and the force shoved him back into the room. It had been so long since Sasori actually hit him that he had never seen it coming. He thought the other man had stopped that many years ago but here they were. Deidara holding his cheek with fear in his eyes and Sasori panting like an angry bull, only seeing red.

"ENOUGH!" Sasori continued and launched a kick that Deidara had no other choice then to take, there he was lying on the floor and the broken puppets his partner was working on. "You want me to touch you?! Oh, I'll touch you!" He gritted as he walked up to him. The strong hold of the puppets hand was put on his collar and he was picked up again. He knew what would happen next but he didn't even fight it. He took it as a punishment. He had to hold the pain for them, for Sasori and for Iris. If he just suffered they wouldn't have to. He would suffer to make them a family again.

Deidara felt a lot better two mornings after Sasori had gone berserk on him, even though he only had been healing for twenty-four hours. A lot of it was thanks to Kakuzus medical attention but still. He was thankful that he probably would be able to get out of bed today. Not that he was in the mood, but if he wanted he could.

But he was quite happy that Iris didn't seem to hate him even though they fought yesterday. She had found him last morning, beaten up and as a total mess. But he had done his part, he had suffered and now he felt like he could continue to carry the weight of their broken family. She hadn't seem too happy about it and at first he had worried all day over it, but she had also returned in the evening, to talk with him and make sure they were on good terms. He was glad she had forgiven him. He was glad Sasori had used him. He was fucked up in the head, and he knew it himself but he was happy this all had happened. It was the first step to healing.

The blond left the bed on weak legs and stumbled his way to the bathroom to wash up in the sink. They had a small toilet with a sink there in their room. No shower but he only needed to splash his face with some water and to drink a couple of glasses too. He look up on the in the mirror. The always young and life full man looked so old and worn out, but of course he was worn out. He was carrying three lives on his shoulders.

What would he do now though? He had done all he could do he thought and even after the other night he knew he wouldn't want to break it with Sasori. They had been through this before. He always came around after he had punished Deidara. It was an old ritual he had hoped Sasori had left behind but apparently not. Well, he had been acting a lot like his younger self lately. Maybe he just slipped back into old habits by accident?

The tired man exited the small bathroom again to go and get ready for the day. He needed to talk to Iris. To keep her happy. She still couldn't know but she could be happy, that was his job. Deidara didn't look up at first as he was drying his face with a towel but as he finally did he stopped in both his steps and his thoughts, seeing Sasori sitting on his side of the bed. His hand stroking the probably still warm sheets he just recently had been laying in.

Their eyes met and for a moment Deidara thought he was just imagining it but clearly he wasn't. Why would his mind play tricks on him like that? "Deidara… We need to talk." Sasori said, seeing the blond wasn't doing much to get anything starting.

This wasn't the old Sasori anymore. He could tell right away. The old Sasori was never sorry. He didn't come begging for forgivness.


	8. Chapter 7

This chapter is a bit shorter than usual but it's been so long since the last that I didn't want to try and fill it out with stupid crap. I'll try get the last parts done and up before this month ends.

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"Deidara… We need to talk." Sasori said, looking up at his lover that now had returned from the bathroom. He had been waiting for only about a minute and hadn't disturbed Deidara in the bathroom. He didn't want to have that conversation in there anyways.

Deidara glazed at his partner who was sitting there, on HIS bed, expecting him to want to talk to him now out of nowhere. He didn't even know how to feel; sure he was happy Sasori was finally coming around but that it had to take this long for him just made him furious.

"What do you want?" Deidara sneered at his partner and violently ripped up the covers on Sasoris free side of the bed to crawl back in under them. Sasori eyed him but didn't make any move to get closer or to interrupt him. His gaze just followed him around as he settled in.

"Did you come to be a dick again? Cause that's what you are, hm." Deidara added before his lover had the chance to reply to his first questions.

Sasori sighed somewhat annoyed at the hostile greeting and spoke. "I came to heal you." He said which made Deidara laugh mockingly, interrupting whatever else the puppeteer might would have said.

"Kakuzu already did that. You're like a day _late_!" Deidara sneered; making sure Sasori would know that his lateness wasn't much appreciated. "It was humiliating and awkward and- I'm too mad to even think about it, hm!"

The blond turned over in the bed, facing his back against his partner and lover, not wanting him to see how he was already starting to tear up in anger. He could feel the puppet move closer to touch him but he made it very clear that that wasn't okay either and moved slightly further away, stopping Sasori and making him move back into his original sitting position.

They were quiet for a while, they were both so tired. Tired of not being able to turn to the other for comfort.

"I know I did bad, I'm so sorry." Sasori suddenly choked out and hid his face in his hands. Hearing his partners voice break made Deidara fly up from his position and turn around, watching the small man jerk as if he was really crying there behind the dead cold fingers. Seeing him so sad instantly rinsed off all his anger and he crawled back up from the covers to come closer to his partner. It had been just the change their fight had needed. They had needed Sasori to finally break, to open up.

Deidara petted his partner comforting on the shoulder as he waited to get to hear more. Sasori welcomed the soft touch and leaned his head against his partners' chest. "You know I'll always be here for you. I'll listen so just… Just tell me what it is, hm." Deidara said low to calm him down. He could feel the puppet nod against him and he gently embraced him, wanting him even closer.

"I know you are." Sasori replied and hugged back. He hugged tight not wanting to let ever let go. It felt much better then what he did to him the other day. He shouldn't have done that, he knew it, but he just couldn't help it. He didn't know what else to do.

"Deidara, I'm scared." Came out of the tiny man's mouth, his voice barley carrying. The statement was not exactly what Deidara had expected to hear, so he gently told him to explain further and again made sure Sasori knew he really was there for him. And that they would take all the time he needed to listen.

Sasori started his telling once he got his voice back in control. He had sighed deeply after his weird non teary cries had stopped and gathered himself slightly to be able to spill the beans. "My puppets. I've put my everything into them. My life, my time…" He started, shaking his head defeated as he spoke. "I was just about to reach three hundred when I lost a third of them battling Chiyo all those years ago. That number took me twenty years to reach…"

"Yeah, I know. You were devastated." Deidara added thoughtful, remembering how down and stressed Sasori had been for a while after. "But then we started talking about family and kids and you seemed to be pretty happy again, hm…"

The puppet nodded confirming to Deidaras input. "Yes. You wanted a kid and I didn't want to wait once we found Seo. She was the perfect mother and I really don't think I would have wanted to look for someone later." Seo had been perfect, and if they had waited she would have gotten too old to carry a child. It had been a rash decision but they both had thought it was the best. "But once we got Iris I was deep down with rebuilding my collection. I felt like I never had time for her or you, I choose my art over our family. And for these past fifteen years I've almost managed to reach three hundred again. It went slower this time since I was training her and spending time with you two, but I somehow managed…"

Deidara suddenly started seeing where this was going and hugged his boyfriend tighter lovingly to show his support. That he hadn't realized it sooner. "And so when Ame got taken… And we ran…" Sasori choked. He couldn't really speak the last word but he didn't have to since Deidara filled in.

"You left your collection in Ame, there was no time to get them with us..." Sasori furiously nodded once again to agree with Deidaras words. He had lost them again. His life's work, his art and a part of himself.

"And the worst part is I wasted fifteen years on them when I could have spent the time with my best friend and with my child!" Sasori burst out, feeling like his heart was turning inside out. He really hated having emotions, yet there was no way to avoid them. No matter how hard he tried to be cold and closed in, he still had them. "What's the point even making puppets anymore when all they do is bringing me pain, and sadness and, and… And I'm scared that I've lost her. She doesn't want me, what good will a father do if he never is around? I've missed so much-"

"Sasori. She loves you, hm." I love you!" Deidara interrupted and pulled Sasori back to look into his eyes. He really looked like he had reached the lowest he ever could reach. He looked so small, much smaller than usual. "You've been a great role model for her. She looks up to you a lot. But right now she's just as scared and confused as you. And she misses you. So please, let us work this out. Together, hm."

"I love you too…" Sasori wailed weak and the blond pulled him back into the hug. "I love you… I love you so much…" He said as he started kissing his partners neck. The small man quickly worked his way up to his lovers' lips and they met for a passionate, sloppy kiss. Both artist moved back up on the bed and laid down together, keeping each other close and forgetting for a while that they had troubles to deal with. This was what they needed first, to be together.

It was nice to be out so early, she thought. It was very bright today again. The sun was shining, but it wasn't too warm just yet and everything looked and smelled fresh from the night before. She was hungry since she had skipped breakfast but she had decided to ignore it for now and just walk as far away as possible first. She had to make sure she put some distains between her and the house before she sat down to eat. She couldn't risk being found that fast; she didn't even know how long it would take before they realized she was gone.

After a couple of hours of walking Iris ended up at a small town and decided to stop to buy some food and a map over the area. She also bought some stuff she could cook later as she bought hot lunch, which was more a brunch since she hadn't eaten breakfast, and she moved out the town again to go sit down in the grass at the end of the forest.

While eating and resting she brought out the map and a pen and after finding the little town on the map she marked it out with a circle and started going backwards where she thought she had come from. She found an area where she assumed the hideout was but didn't mark it out since she didn't want anyone finding the map and checking out what that circle was. No, it was enough that she knew where she was now, that way she could find her way back. Not that she would travel back anytime soon, but just in case.

She studied the map some more and found a road she decided to travel along. She rather wanted to travel in the forest since it gave her better camouflage but she could travel faster by road and wouldn't have to worry about bumps or trees to avoid. After a while on the road she would head back into the forest though to set camp, hopefully by some water.

She finished up and packed her things back again to continue. After a few minutes on the road she was lucky enough to catch a lift with a farmer that was transporting hay with his dray. With his help she could earn in some daytime and also travel further then by foot. She thanked the nice man when he let her off and turned back into the woods again, map tight in hand as she marked out where she had traveled and to help her find a good spot for the night.


	9. Chapter 8

Fuck

It's been forever

Let's finish this

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"Ah, fuck. Shit, no- Danna… T-too sore still-…" Deidara moaned pained. One of his hands landed on the naked chest of his boyfriend and lover to make him back away. Sasori didn't hesitate a second and moved back, giving his man some extra space between them.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to start…" Sasori mumbled embarrassed and scratched the back of his neck as he sat up. "I'm just so used to that… That we do it after we make up."

Deidara pulled down his t-shirt as he sat up as well, leaning back against the back board. "I know, I did it by reflex too but… I'm in worse shape than I thought, hm." He laughed with a tired sigh. The two men met each other's gaze and Deidara smiled calming to make sure he wasn't mad or thought it was inappropriate. Just to see Sasori back away so fast and so shamefully made him calm, he knew he wouldn't try to hurt him. Not again.

"Deidara, I know you're already sorta healed and stuff…" The puppet continued and broke eye contact. His fists clenched on his knees. Just moving away didn't feel like enough proof that he was trustworthy. He needed to prove himself better. "But frankly, Kakuzu isn't as narrow as I am." He said. "I could probably boost your healing a little bit if you'd let me. And well, I don't mind healing certain part he might have skipped. For reasons…"

The redhead glanced down on the blond's body but Deidara just waved for him to look back up at his face. He was so cute when he worried. It made him feel loved.

"That sounds pretty good, hm." The younger man smiled as he moved back down on the bed, letting the medic take a look at him.

Iris stopped for a second to check the map in her hand and to make sure she knew where she was on it. She was getting close to a river, just about… Two kilometers south east? She wasn't sure. She wasn't that good at approximating distance. But at least she knew it was a reachable goal from her current spot and if she could find the river she could travel along it until she found a good camping spot for the night. Was it too obvious that she would stay by the water though? If well, her father's came looking, would the look by the river first? She decided that she was willing to take that risk though. She would need the water after all.

With a sharp turn she left the gravel road and went into the thick woods. She reached the water faster than she had planned but she didn't mind. The faster the better, she guessed. The river was smaller than she had thought too. It was more just a stream, but it was just enough. Now she just needed to find a spot quiet and calm enough to sleep at.

Sasori sighed proudly over his work and kissed the faint mark that was left of a bruise on Deidaras' lower stomach. If someone just cast a quick look over the blond it was almost impossible to see that he even had been hurt in the first place. There were some scars here and there, but they all looked old or like birthmarks. He had to hand it to Sasori. He really was a professional.

The puppet moved back, his hand lingering on Deidaras naked body and his before worried look was replaced with a strong smile. Deidara couldn't help smiling back. It felt good to have him back, it finally felt like it was the two of them against the world again. He didn't feel alone or abandoned anymore. And Sasori seemed to be more relived then anything to have gotten his burden off his chest.

"It's going to be fine, Danna. I know it's hard but we'll make it fine, hm." Deidara said rolling up a bit so he could start getting dressed. Sasoris' smile toned down a little at the statement but he still seemed determined to keep it up. But instead of replying he left the bed to head over to the dresser in the room to fetch new clothes for his lover.

When Sasori didn't speak more and just handed the blond his clothes, Deidara decided to continue. "Do you want me to talk to Pein about your puppets? Maybe he'll let us go and try retrieve them, hm." Deidara suggested wary, with his legs halfway through his pants.

"They're probably been shipped to Suna though. Don't you think?" Sasori sighed and crossed his arms. He looked away, his smile completely gone by now. It was too hard to keeping it up. "Since the five great are sharing Ame between them I would assume Suna is claiming my works as theirs since I'm from there."

Huffing annoyed Deidara got up and pulled the new shirt over his head. "Such greedy bastards… Well, I guess we'll have to go to Suna then-"

"No, no… Let's just forget about it. It's pointless." Sasori sighed and walked up to his partner. They shared a quiet moment as the redhead studied the taller man's features, as well as taking a piece of his hair between his fingers. "It's too dangerous to head to Suna openly. I don't want you to head straight into a trap or risk your life for my clumsiness."

Deidara looked down on the puppet. He was smiling again, but there was nothing happy about his smile. The bomber sighed audible. "Well at least they won't break them. Hopefully. Hopefully they'll save them as important artifacts and maybe one day we can retrieve them, hm."

The younger man took a hold of his partners' shoulders to make him look up at him and to get his full attention. "But Sasori, just so you know. I know exactly how much your art means to you. And I know if the roles were switched, if it was my art that had been taken, you would be halfway to Iwa trying to get it back for me the second I told you about it, hm. So understand how I feel about it. Not getting them back is going to pain me just as much as it pains you."

The words must have touched the puppet, as he lowered his head thinking hard. It was true, Sasori wouldn't hesitate a second to try and protect his lovers legacy. He had been foolish to think Deidara would be any different.

"Sooo don't be surprised if I leave to get them, hm." Deidara added mumbling.

"You're ridiculous." Sasori huffed as he started grinning. And to Deidaras' surprise, the short man hugged him.

"And you're too precious. Have I ever said that?" Sasori mumbled into the newly washed t-shirt, looking up. The sound of the fabric rubbing against skin and the deep, pleased sigh Deidara let out felt all too homey.

Deidara smirked teasingly without replying and fluffed Sasoris' red hair, just since his silence to his love filled words made the puppeteer ever so embarrassed. And he laughed low seeing him hide his face again; if he could have been blushing he probably would have.

Even though she had put up tents multiple times before, she had never struggled with it as much as she was this time. Well, this was the first time she was putting up a tent by herself. Normally Sasori or Deidara would help her while the other parent was setting up the rest of the camp. That was one of their favorite family activities, camping. Deidara loved taking them to all kinds of places and show them the beauties of the world. And Sasori appreciated studying different plants they might encounter and loved bring home samples. Iris took pleasure in the calm atmosphere of the vacation, where there was no hurry and she was allowed to spend hours in the warm tent with her books, of course after the three of them had spent the day sightseeing.

Cursing she pulled the last string and hammered it into the ground. She had worked up quite the sweat during just the rigging of the tent and she was quite beat but, it was up now. She felt embarrassed to be so tired. She was training regularly so this shouldn't be a problem! But… Honestly, lately she had been slacking off. She trained when she was home at her mom's place too of course but not as much as she did when she stayed with her dads. She trained with Deidara when he trained, and he trained at least twice a week. And Sasori didn't have to train but he had been her coach. Training her and teaching her as she grew up and he always made sure she was in great shape.

It made her kind of sad thinking to about it. Sasori, who used to care so much about her well being didn't even want to talk to her anymore. But she shook the thoughts away though quickly. This was why she had run away, so she wouldn't have to think about them anymore. She was cutting herself out of the family. Even though she missed them so… It was torture.

The young girl stopped in her camp setting. Just to stand there and silently cry over how lonely she felt. The small tent didn't seem as inviting as it should. She had no interest in even cooking; she just wanted to go home. No, she wanted to go back in time. To a time where she was happy and her parents were happy and they did stuff together like a normal family. That was all she ever wanted, to have a normal, calm, happy life.

The crying made her feel a lot better quickly though. As soon as she had dried her tears, she didn't feel as helpless and isolated anymore. She felt like she could handle this again. She would forget about the past and shape her own future. She'd travel far and make a new life, the perfect life. It be calm and loving, and she could use her past as inspiration for her books she was going to write!

"Can't you go talk to her? What if she doesn't even open for me?" Sasori said nervously as he hung his hand on the handle to his and Deidaras' rooms' door. Deidara had moved on to fix his hair and makeup. The three of them would head out for dinner was the plan. Early dinner… But first Sasori would have to go and apologize to his daughter.

The younger man rolled his eyes through the mirror. "Since when were you so scared to talk to your _own_ daughter, hm?" He sighed; blinking to make sure his eyeliner had dried. "Besides if she doesn't want to talk to you we can't go out for dinner… So go make peace so we can go out and explain to her the situation, hm."

Unwillingly Sasori nodded and took a deep breath as well. He hesitated a second longer by the door before he opened it and left to go across the hall, stopping by the closed door leading to Iris' room.

"Honey… It… It's me." He said careful as he knocked on the door. "Can I come in? I haven't… Haven't seen your face in a while, I'd like to look at you…"

Nothing. No response. 'Great, she really is giving me the silent treatment', Sasori thought. 'Well, I deserve it'.

"Iris. I'm serious. We have to talk. Please just open up-"He tried while feeling the door, and to his surprise it wasn't locked so the puppeteer could just walk in.

It was empty. The bed was made; there was no sign of life anywhere. The abnormal pile of books on the bed didn't seem promising. Sasori felt his body go cold, or colder then the dead body already was. Something was definitively wrong here.

* * *

Note: Okay, so I'm gonna stop here for now. I will continue this story but it's going slower to write then I thought, so I rather post the ending in parts as I write them instead of just posting a cluster of text and getting it all out in one go. I would assume there will be maybe 1-2 chapters more after this? Depending on how I write it out. Expect the next part out soon though. I should try and have it done by next weekend.


	10. Chapter 9

If I can post the last chapter before Mars 4th, then technically I finished this story in under a year…

Though it took like, almost a full year…

* * *

 _It was fall, pretty cold and gruesome. She was wearing her fathers' cloak over her training clothes as she waited silently for her dads to come back. They had promised to be back in just five minutes. It had been half an hour already._

 _Iris was starting to get impatient, and really cold. The big cloak wasn't helping much since it was huge on her ten year old body, but it was better than nothing. Underneath it she was holding a handful of rope and a couple of kunais. They scraped low against each other as she played with them back and forth in her hands. She had been training with the rope at first, controlling it with her puppet jutsu and making it move easily around her as an extension of herself, but just before Sasori and Deidara left the puppet had hung off his cloak on her and had given her the knifes, saying that she might want to use them as well as the rope for the next assignment._

 _Then they left. No explanation for what she was supposed to do. She assumed it was part of the training, to wait, but she was getting more and more nervous the longer they took._

 _Then out of the woods, a few silhouettes appeared and she instantly buckled up, looking alive as her dads came back bloody and with a man pulled between them. He looked injured and terrified._

 _Iris flinched back and looked first at the helpless man then back at her dads', questioning. "What… What is this?" She asked as they came close enough to hear her and stopped to let the man go. They threw him on the ground in front of her, he looked beaten up but he was still strong enough to keep himself up with his arms. His legs looked broken though._

 _Deidaras' eyes were locked on the man on the ground at all times, just in case he would start trying to run but he seemed to be too paralyzed to move._

" _Sorry it took so long…" Sasori started. "We had originally prepared two of them but as we came to retrieve them they were about to escape and we had to… Take care of one of them. He put up too much of a fight to come with us. This one though, went pretty easily when his comrade passed." He explained calmly while he ran the back of his hand over his forehead in an attempt to clean it, but it just accidently smearing out more blood then there was before._

 _Iris tried to look calm but she couldn't help her mouth from falling open slightly. She came back to reality though and jumped a little as the man on the ground reached out for her, seeking help, and she took a step back._

 _To protect her, Deidara kicked the injured man forcing him to fall into a pile on the ground and Iris moved back even more. She took off the cloak and let it fall, her hands raised but shaky as she held the knifes' high, prepared for instructions._

 _Sasori and Deidara moved back as well, creating a triangle with their daughter and with the hurt man in the middle. Sasori looked up and met the girls' eyes firmly. "Your next lesson is to get used to the feeling of taking someone's' life." He said. Iris swallowed hard, knowing exactly what the next sentence and instruction would be._

" _You'll have to kill him."_

When the puppet couldn't find his daughter anywhere he looked his reaction was to quickly run back to his and Deidaras' bedroom, throwing the door open with such force that Deidara almost pulled out a chunk of hair with his brush.

"What the fUCk, SASORI-!" Deidara yelled as he turned around to scroll his partner for scaring him, but the look on the puppeteers face was somehow even more breathtaking then the door opening.

"She's… I can't find her. Anywhere! I've checked the entire base twice. No one has seen her today…" Sasori rambled as he fell back towards the doorframe. Deidara instantly got up and took a few quick steps to come hold his partner up.

"Calm down. What are you saying? Do you think… She can be out, hm?" Deidara suggested, trying to meet his partners' worried eyes. Just because they didn't find her didn't mean they should panic. She was pretty old after all, she could handle going for a walk by herself.

"I haven't looked outside…" Sasori admitted between his fast breathing. He took a firm grip of Deidaras' arm while the feeling of incredible guilt took him over. "But… But, what if she ran away? It's my fault, I'm sure. It's always my fault! Every time she gets upset it's over something I did-" He rambled pointlessly so that Deidara had to step in and stop him.

"Sasori no Danna, listen to me. It is not your fault! We will find her, let's… Let's go call Seo and, and talk to Pein. We can put together a search team; we will find her, hm!"

The puppet looked up and nodded to confirm that he had registered what he said and that he thought it was a good plan. It would go much faster if they could get the whole Akatsuki out looking, and maybe it was just so simple that she just had walked back to Seos' place? She had tried doing that once before when she was younger and had been angry at them but they found her pretty quickly that time.

She had gotten the fire going close to the water and quite far away from the tent, like a good camper would. It wasn't really starting to get dark yet since it was summer and the sun stayed up long but it was starting to get gloomy. And she was getting hungry again after a long day of travel so it was high time to make dinner and to round up the day before trying to sleep.

It would be hard for her to relax and sleep though, she knew it, since she was alone but she hoped for at least a few hours of undisturbed sleep. And she would have to sleep without fire too since she was alone and couldn't guard it at all times but it was alright. It was summer and the summer nights were hot enough.

Her dinner didn't taste that well since she only had plain ingredients to use but it had to make due. She ate fast with only the sound of the forest around her as company and after that she quickly put out the fire so she could move into the tent and stay there for the rest of the evening.

She had always thought she was a lonely person that preferred solitude but now that she was here and had infinite peace she felt, unhappy. She missed everyone. She missed her mom, her dads', her friends at the orphanage and the friendly Akatsuki members that were like family to her. Not even the single book she had bought was enough to comfort her. No, she didn't feel like reading at all. She just went to sleep right away, hoping she would feel less lonely in the morning.

No, she wasn't back at Seos' place. But the mother promised to call back the second she showed up, IF she showed up. But they made another very interesting discovery. A tent and some other supplies were missing out the supply closet. Hidan had made the find as they all had gone through the base once more. So now they were more or less sure she really had run away, and it was time to make a plan of "attack".

Pein and Konan Stayed at home in case she would return. Sasori and Deidara took to the skies, trying to cover as much land as fast as possible while Hidan and Kakuzu went into the nearest town to look around there and to see if anyone had seen a young, blond girl traveling alone. Kisame and Itachi were unfortunately out on a mission so they couldn't help to look.

They stopped their search for a few hours in the middle of the night as it was at its darkest and it would be impossible to see anything from up high. Hidan and Kakuzu returned as well. They went to sleep a few hours before they would head out again, to check another close by town. But now it was too late to go there and knock on doors and shops. Nothing was open at this hour.

Deidara had, after a lot of complaining, gone to bed too to rest before they would go out again. Sasori had insisted he rested and promised he would wake him the second the sun went up. And while the blond slept he sat up, thinking about his little ray of sunshine, being out there in the world on her own, far away from him and Deidara. He had to bring her back, he just had too. He couldn't imagine losing her. For the first time in so long he really felt like a parent. He felt the strong parental need to protect her and cuddle her. If anything happened to her he'd personally make sure the entire country burned down.

The minute it got light outside in the morning, the two artists were out the door and up on one of Deidaras' creations again to continue the search. Deidara climbed on first and Sasori joined quickly after, sitting behind him and hugging him tight as they rose up in the air. He didn't have to hold him, but he felt so worried and so unstable that the closeness made the situation slightly better. Deidara placed his hand on Sasoris arm to show his support and showing that he was just as worried. They went around silently, looking off the bird on one side each looking for any signs of smoke or water or just anything that could lead them to their only child.

Both were too scared to speak. They felt like they only could speak if they saw something worth checking out. But until then they were both too tense to be able to chat calmly and properly. They were both imagining the worst kinds of scenarios; even though they were sure it probably wouldn't come true. But what if it did? Then what? They were too terrified to think about it. They just had to find her and see then.

" _She handled it better than I thought. I thought she would… Hesitate more, hm." Deidara said low as he leaned in closer to Sasoris' ear. The puppeteer looked proudly over the blond girl that now was an outright killer. She had ended up using the ropes anyways so she wasn't stained with blood like her dads. She had just been intensely strangling the man for as long as it took for him to stop breathing._

 _Iris just stood there while her parents talk to each other. She couldn't hear them anymore. Not right now, at least. Everything felt damp. It had been so easy. She had no idea how strong she really was. Imagine if her chakra level wasn't abnormally weak. What power could she posses if she was… Average? Of course she wouldn't be half as strong as she was without her fathers' teaching. They were both very strong shinobis and she would never, ever forget that. She knew that they were holding back on her as they trained, if she would be in an actual fight with one of them she wouldn't last a second._

 _She hated fighting though. She didn't want to have to do this; she didn't want her parents to fight. She would never follow the steps of her fathers'. She wanted a calm life, with a pretty house and with a loving family. She wanted Sasori and Deidara to always be there for her and to exist in her perfect, loving dream world._

 _The young girl walked around the dead body on the ground and went up to hug her fathers. Both got slightly startled and looked down on her as the three of them got pushed together, but they didn't push her away. They just responded to the hug by embracing her back._


	11. Chapter 10

Sorry for the delay ^^;

It's just that I've had a lot on my plate for the last few weeks and… Well, I haven't been in a prime writing state. I'm also very bad at writing endings so I've just kind of… Avoided it as long as possible. But this story will haunt me forever if I don't finish it so here you go. The exciting, messy, and slightly rushed, end to "The Girl Named After a Song".

* * *

It was already midday when Iris woke up the next day. The threes around her and the tent had been shading her slumber, not like back in her room in the new base, so she didn't wake up from the light or heat. She just woke up because she was well rested. It was an odd change, but she didn't feel like moving. She didn't feel like going up, getting dressed, take down the tent and move forward, even though she probably should be doing just that.

No, she just didn't feel like doing anything. So that's what she did, at first at least. She stayed in the tent much longer than she would have done if she was home in her bed, just lying there and not really doing anything but thinking. But eventually she got too hungry and too restless to do nothing so unwillingly she got up. Just like her fathers she couldn't handle sitting still without being productive for a longer period of time, so she had to do something.

So Iris got up and lazily threw on some new clothes and brushed out her hair. She went out and started a new fire to cook what she had with her. She decided that she wasn't in a hurry anywhere, so she would stay here one more night. She hadn't been found by her parents yet so maybe they didn't care to look? Or maybe they were waiting for her to come back? Well, they'd wait forever then.

She spent some extra time on cooking instead and really made sure to enjoy the quiet, calm meal now that she wouldn't have to hurry on just yet. It was a beautiful day too, so she was quite happy with her decision. But around the end of her meal, the calm of the forest was disturbed by distant voices and breaking twigs. She got up on her feet, preparing herself for what was to come. She hadn't really thought she would meet anyone out here but maybe this was a common spot for people to pass? She would find out soon enough at least.

But the people that appeared were not something she had been ready for. No, it wasn't just some lonely farmer or a nice little couple out for a walk; it was small group of men, looking shady and giddy. She lowered her stands a little as she stared confused at them; they looked equally confused back at her. Maybe they had seen her smoke and though this was a bigger camp then it really was and that was why they looked confused. Maybe they were looking for someone specifically and she hadn't been it?

Suddenly one of the men, that seemed to be taking the lead, started straight out laughing at the scene. He was tall and had a beard, plus he looked slightly more expensive than the others, like he was wearing more valuable clothes. The others seemed to be waiting for him to stop laughing before they did anything. They chuckled slightly and eyed the young girl like a piece of meat. It didn't make the little blond feeling any safer, to be honest. Every second made her feel more and more uncomfortable and helpless but she couldn't show it in case they really were bad news. Instead she just had to put her guard up again.

"Are you alone out here, kid?" The tall, bearded, man asked once he calmed down. "Where are your mom and dad?" He was looking smug and there was something icky in his voice that she didn't like. While he spoke the other men started walking closer to her camp, grinning and looking around at her stuff. Iris tried to look intimidating but failed quite hard since she was also eying the men carefully, trying to understand their pattern and why they were so interested in her things.

"What's it to you?" She asked back worried but with a bit of bite in her voice. "Stay back! I don't trust you, please leave." She admitted loudly hoping they would listen.

But they didn't listen. The man that had spoken to her smiled too calmly, like he took pity on her. "Fightsy eh? So you're alone? That just makes things so much easier for us."

She flinched as a man grabbed her by the arm and she turned to see his giddy grin. He was eyeing the golden chain she was wearing around her neck interested. That's when it hit her. Bandits! These men must be bandits! The saw her smoke and now that they knew she was alone they saw her as an easy target. They probably lingered around the forest, attacking any camps they could get their hands on.

By reflex she grabbed the jewelry with her free hand and gave the man a dark, challenging look. "Hey, boss. She's wearing gold! Should I rip it off or..?" He yelled out, looking up and not really giving her angry eye the right attention.

"Just take the whole girl, we can probably sell her off too." The bearded man replied as he lost interest in her as well. He moved on to check out the tent with the others.

Iris took this opportunity to break free. Since she hadn't struggled until now, the man holding her had only cared to hold her with a loose grip, and the moment she felt him let it go even more as he relaxed, she took action. The little girl pulled out her arm from his hold and instantly his attention was back on her, confused, like he hadn't understood what happened. He couldn't be the brightest in the group, but he did know he would have to get a hold of her again to hold her down so he turned to grab her once more.

The young girl stepped back fast, stepping her foot in the pouring water from the stream and almost falling over. "Ey, come back here. Get her!" She heard as she just turned and started running. She ran fast. She put all her strength into her legs and ran deeper into the forest.

She couldn't fight. She never liked fighting, she preferred running. Just like she ran from this threat she had run away from her family. She always ran when times get tough, she had lost her dads' and now even the little packing she had. Including her last money.

"Should I run after her?" The man who had dropped the girl asked.

"Don't bother. You won't live long enough to get to her, hm." A blond individual replied, gaining the boss' and the rest of the bandit's attention.

They hadn't even noticed the two black dressed men appearing. They had appeared quietly like the wind, and looked menacing like a couple of agitated wolfs.

"Yoo, you think you're tough, blondie?" The bearded man said, reaching to verbal threat. "We found her first, so her stuff is ours-"

He didn't get to finish the sentence before the redhead had moved, fast as the speed of sound, cutting his throat open.

The group gasped loudly and took a large step back as their boss spit up blood and fell together in a pile. "Now…" Sasori growled low. "Who else is going to stand between me and our daughter?"

She couldn't have run for that long before she got too tired to carry on. She really was out of shape, so she fell together, hiding by a particularly thick three.

She sat there, trying to breathe as calmly and as quietly as possibly. She didn't know if they had followed her or not so she had to be cautious. But the minutes passed and nothing happened.

She sighed kind of relived before pulling up her knees to hide her face and to wallow up in shame. She was a disappointment to everyone. To her family and to herself. She felt bad that she ran. She could have taken them down. Or at least there would have been less shame in fighting till her last breath then to run her throat dry. She was just so done! Done with everything. Once she got her breath back fully, she'd continue running. She'd run till she ran away from herself, or till she dropped dead. Because she would do just as much good being dead as she did alive. Actually, she'll be more useful dead because then she wouldn't take up unnecessary energy and space.

She buried her face deeper in, choking on her tears that were stuck on their way out of her dry throat. That's when she felt it. A hand was placed on her shoulder and she tensed up. It was a man's hand, it took a second for her to figure out. The bandits finally caught up to her! Well, even though she wanted to die she wouldn't let them take the best of her again. She'd fight this time, prove something of her.

"Leave me alone! You already got what you wanted!" She cried out and turned up, to land a powerful left hook on the man's cheek. She put more power into her punch by concentrating her chakra to that single spot. It was a hard punch, she could feel something break as the hard sound of flesh hitting flesh echoed in the calm forest.

Iris stood up and opened her eyes. With a startled shriek she covered her mouth with her hands and stumbled back, seeing it wasn't a bandit she hit but one of her fathers, Deidara. Deidara was down on his knees, clutching his pained cheek from the unpredicted hit.

He looked up and their eyes met. She panicked when she saw a drop of blood fall from the man's nose.

"Iris-!" He exclaimed through the pain as the girl finally teared up and dashed away once more. Of course she'd fuck it up when she actually tried being useful! She deserved this. Deidara was the last person she ever wanted to hurt yet she had. She didn't deserve staying with him.

Deidara cursed low and got to his feet. Sasori, who had been staying behind to finish off the rest of the group finally caught up with him and stopped by his side. At first he didn't realize what was going on but soon enough he saw his lover's bloody hands and calmed down his steps to focus on him.

"Oh my-! Deidara, are you alright?" The puppet asked, trying to get a better look at the injury.

"Yeah, I'm… Fuck, I think she knocked out a tooth…" The blond grunted and lowered his hand to look at the blood. He let Sasori study him as he himself tried to find said tooth somewhere on the ground.

But when Sasori started rolling up his sleeves to help heal his partner, Deidara stopped him and pointed in the direction the girl had gone to. "You can do that later, go get her first, hm!" He spat out ignoring the blood that he spat out on his lover. "I'll be fine, hm! Go! Bring her home!" He said strict and wouldn't lower his hand before Sasori had unsurely looked at him and then started running in the right direction.

"Get her home…" Deidara repeated low for himself as he fell together on the ground. The pain in his cheek wasn't anything to the pain he'd feel if he lost her again.

"IRIS!" Sasori yelled as he picked up his steps. He could hear the bushes rustle not far away from him, and it got louder the closer he got, so he aimed for the sound and ran. Refusing to let her slip out of his reach.

The familiar voice calling for her only made her tears thicken, but she was determined to outrun him. Even though something in the back of her mind knew she never would be able to do it at this point. It was just a matter of time. She would get tired again and Sasori could run forever. Stupid puppet!

Since she was more or less blinded by her tears she didn't see the root in front of her that she rammed her foot under. Her fast escape came to an abrupt end as she slammed face forward into the ground. With a low moan she pulled out her foot and searched for any larger injuries, but except for a slight sore feeling and some easy bruises, she was fine.

"Iris!" Sasori repeated as he appeared through the trees and saw his little girl, hurt and sad on the ground. He quickly kneeled by her side, but instead of trying to heal her leg or her hands as she first had thought, he pulled her up to sitting position and hugged her. Hard and long. He pulled her in towards his chest and let his face hide in the nap of her neck. She just sat there, in chock, not remembering when her redheaded father had last hugged her like this. If ever. But she didn't hate it.

She thought he would scroll her for running from home, or scroll her for making them worry but it never came. Instead she felt a faint twitch in her father's body as he sobbed quietly against her cheek. "I'm sorry." He said, her eyes widen at the words she hadn't expected to hear. "I'm sorry I didn't get to see you sooner. But I'm here now and I'll never leave you."

It didn't take more than that to make her start crying again. So both just sat there together, silently crying in each other's arms.

"Oh! There you are! Took you long enough, hm!" Deidara exclaimed as the redhead had returned to him, Iris by his side holding his hand. The blond had been leaning on the same tree Iris hide behind before, holding down his bleeding with the arm of his cloak.

"Sorry, we had to talk things out." Sasori apologized and scratched the back of his head. The had forgot about time but the two of them had probably been speaking for at least twenty minutes about why Sasori had been the way he had been and that he felt awful that it had affected her and Deidara as well.

But now he felt awful that he had left Deidara here alone injured. The two holding hands let go of each other so Sasori could kneel down once more to start healing his lover.

"You throw quite the punch, my sunshine, hm." Deidara laughed as he handed his tooth over to Sasori to place back.

Sasori frowned and took the tooth with a disturbed look. "Shut up Deidara, or I can't heal your stupid mouth." He grunted more with love then with actual annoyance.

"I'm sorry I punched you, dad." Iris said shameful and looked down on her feet, but Deidara had already forgiven her and moved on.

"It's nothing, honey. I've had worse, hm." He replied but after that he stayed quiet seeing Sasori glared at him like he wanted to punch him himself if he didn't stop talking.

When Deidara was healed, the three of them retraced their steps. Iris didn't have to set her foot back into her camp, Sasori and Deidara made sure to take care of it and pack together all then needed. It was a bloodbath there right now and the dads' just didn't want their child to have to deal with that right now. So while they packed, Iris was sitting alone on the big, white bird that would take them all home. She made small circles on the surface of the harden clay with her hand, feeling a bit lost and helpless. Yet not in a bad way. She let her dads' spoil and take care of her now. She didn't feel as much of a burden anymore.

Because she knew they loved her. She knew they did it out of love. They were messy and bad at showing their feelings, but all they ever did for her was because they loved her.

When they flew back home to the new base she could sit between them. No one said anything, they didn't have to. They would have the whole summer to speak to one another. Right now they just needed to be.

Be together as a family. A weird, little and messy family.


End file.
